Quote Of The Day By Monty Don: 'Inevitably, The Real Garden With A Growing Family Of Children Will Be...'

Some people are born with green thumbs. Others have to spend decades teaching themselves how to keep plants alive. Monty Don is somewhere in between the two; while he wasn't always the famous horticulturist he is today, he has been open about the fact that as a child, he didn't always love gardening. But a lot has changed since then. Born in 1955, Don was the baby of the family, with four older siblings. His father was an army officer who was stationed in Berlin, where Don was born.

In the 1980s, Don and his wife, Sarah, were neck-deep in a jewelry business that catered to the rich and famous, including the likes of Princess Diana. But in 1990, after struggling for a number of years, their company officially came to an end. It was around this time that Don began to take gardening more seriously, and his career in the media soon took off. He began by dipping his toe into television, with a brief gardening segment in 1989, and by 1994 he was heading up the gardening column in the Observer, which he continued through 2006.

Since the early 2000s, Don has continued to grow in his love for gardening, as well as his transparency about his struggle with depression, which has been ongoing for several decades. For him, gardening has been more than a side gig, hobby, or lucrative business — it has been healing. As a father, husband, and horticulturist who is loved the world over for his passion for plants, Don has learned that life is full of ups and downs. And that's why Monty Don is today's quote of the day.

Monty Don's quote reads: "Inevitably, the real garden with a growing family of children will be untidy, messy even, noisy and often destructive. It drives arch control-freaks like myself mad. But I hate it when they are not there."

This grounding and realistic quote is from Don's book, "My Roots: A Decade in the Garden," which he published in 2012. While the book is on its surface about gardening, it is filled with nuggets of wisdom about a variety of real-life experiences. Alongside the quote above, Don is open about his struggle with mental health, and he admits that he was a challenging personality for his family at times, driving home the reality that difficult emotions can feel very real in the present moment but aren't what is paramount in life.

Don's quote shows that perfection is not the goal, and that staying mindful of what matters long-term — such as our loved ones — is vastly more important than mere aesthetics. Though it is particularly applicable to parents who are in the thick of the messy years, it can also be helpful for renters dreaming of the day that they purchase their own house. It can also be an encouragement for gardeners who are trying to make the most out of a small backyard.

Don's quote reminds us that there will inevitably be challenges that arise in our day-to-day lives, including in our gardens. While we may be tempted to fall into the cycle of reacting to difficulties out of a place of frustration, adopting a more balanced and gratitude-filled perspective can sometimes be the most adaptive choice. This is apparent in Don's own experience, which at various times was riddled with messy dynamics and moments when life was not going according to plan.

When he was dealing with depression, Don admits that he was not always pleasant to be around; his wife even threatened to leave with their children if he did not make the necessary changes. The happy ending is that Don was able to find the help he needed to get on top of his seasonal affective disorder and depression. Part of his salve was spending time in the garden, which he has said he needs to spend a full day in each week in order to maintain his mental health.

We all have areas of our homes and gardens that feature difficult or unsightly aspects; the living room that is littered with too many toys, your pup's dog kennel eyesore permanently installed in the living room, or your spouse's favorite recliner that makes your skin crawl. The reality is that living in a community is not always neat, tidy, or aesthetically pleasing, but it is essential to our happiness. While honoring your preferences as you design the perfect cottage garden is an important form of self-care, playing the tape to the end can reveal what matters more than a perfectly executed plan.

• "You need nature more than she needs you. It is not an equal relationship. Serve her well and she will look after you. Abuse her and everyone loses." — from "Down to Earth: Gardening Wisdom"

• "However naturalistic and 'wild' it appears, a garden is always an artificial environment made by people for people, so it makes sense to put the considerations of people — rather than plants — first." — from "My Roots: A Decade in the Garden"

• "An immaculate garden is a hostile place to most wildlife. Beautifully weeded borders, with every fallen leaf and twig gathered and disposed of, hedges kept constantly crisp and grass mown to within a fraction of its life may make a certain sort of gardener glow with pride but will provide little comfort for most of our birds, mammals and insects." — from "Down to Earth: Gardening Wisdom"

• "You need to see bare branches to know the full astonishing shock of the new leaves come next April. You need the flat, brown emptiness of the mixed borders to measure their summer fullness." — from "My Roots: A Decade in the Garden"

• "I have a visceral need to scrape a hollow in the ground. It has to do with the literal earth. The herbalist/acupuncturist knew me better than I knew myself — earth heals me better than any medicine or regime." — from a 2000 article in The Guardian