My 'Dream Yard' Has Become A Living Nightmare: Don't Make The Same Mistake

When my husband and I were looking to buy a house in 2020, we toured exactly three properties before putting in an offer on our forever home: a spacious but cozy split-level abode with a roomy backyard that boasts a view to the water. We moved in during peak summer, and the previous homeowner's impressive garden was showing off, stretching around all four sides of the fenced-in yard. We were charmed. But as it turns out, a big yard and garden equals big maintenance, and big bucks.

The previous homeowners were both retirees, and it was clear they had a lot of time to sink into the landscape. The front yard featured several kinds of hydrangeas and an azalea that bursts hot pink every spring. In the back, the garden perimeter featured an array of romantic flowering shrubs, rose bushes, peonies, hostas, rose of Sharon, and several towering lilac trees. In the center of the yard was a small but growing weeping cherry tree and a wooden kids' playhouse built over a sandbox.

I was about six months pregnant, and my mind danced with visions of my baby digging in the sandbox while I clipped fresh peonies for the kitchen table. Today, with two small children and full-time jobs, that fantasy looks a little bit different.

At first, we tried to keep up with the garden. (I'll admit, the "we" here is quite generous, as I mostly entertained our new baby while my husband honed his green thumb.) There was constant work of mulching, weeding, and watering — though the previous homeowners installed an intricate buried hose system, which helped. It was a big time and monetary investment, and on top of it, my husband kept getting bad cases of poison ivy, which crept in under the fence from our neighbors' houses on both sides, no matter how hard we tried to keep it at bay.

Then, there was the mowing. That charming cherry tree and treehouse meant a riding mower or lawn tractor couldn't access the back portion of the yard, so it had to be done with a push mower. And the perimeter garden slowed the work of weed-whacking the edges. After a particularly brutal case of poison ivy, we made the decision to remove the garden and dig out the weeping cherry tree so our little one would have more room to run. (We kept the treehouse, which remains a favorite today.)

We paid a local landscaping company thousands of dollars to dig out all of the bushes except for the rose of Sharon and lilacs, which are relatively low-maintenance aside from yearly pruning. Then, we spent the rest of the summer spending precious nap time nailing in landscape fabric to cover the now-bare perimeter and covering it with decorative white landscape rocks. We left one stretch bare, and we've since planted arborvitae to offer added privacy as well as a few experimental vegetables grown from seed.

It was tough to admit that we couldn't handle the upkeep on such a beautiful yard and garden, but we've since created an atmosphere that is both beautiful and low-maintenance. After removing the weeping cherry tree, we seeded with a sun and shade mix that is suitable for our location in the Northeast. Now, we only mow weekly in the summer and seed patchy areas every fall. Weeds sometimes poke through the landscape fabric and decorative rocks, and we pull as needed, but there is no more daily pruning, weeding, or watering.

Instead of focusing on gardening, we pivoted to focus on entertaining. We turned an extended corner of the driveway into a patio with an indoor/outdoor rug and a wicker table and chairs snagged on Facebook Marketplace, then added a fire pit and grill.

If you go the same route, you'll want to look into the best grass for your region or an eco-friendly grass alternative. To transform your backyard into a party space, incorporate hardscaping and outdoor seating. If you have little ones, make sure to include them in your planning as well. We used the space saved by the cherry tree to install a swing set, passed down from a neighbor. Between that and the treehouse, which will be receiving a fresh paint job this fall, our space is now a favorite for playdates.